Following the advice above can help you stay safe in the dating world, but if someone or something makes you feel unsafe, it’s your right to leave (whether you’re leaving an online conversation or an actual date). If you’re just messaging, you can simply stop responding and block the other person. Many dating apps as parabuscarpareja.com will let you unmatch and report problematic behavior. If you’re on a date in real life, get up and walk away, go to the restroom and call a ride, ask the restaurant for an escort to your car, or message a friend and ask them to come to meet you. If you’ve already given out your phone number, there are also ways to block phone numbers.
How you leave is up to you, but you should never feel bad for putting your safety first, even if it means you have to do something that feels rude.
What if you’re not especially worried about your own safety, but you want to be a stand-up date? There are lots of things you can do to make your date feel safe and comfortable. Suggest meeting in a public place—not your home. And while you’re making plans, keep it to one relatively short activity so your date has an easy out if they’re not having a great time.
Don’t ask tons of personal questions (even if you’re on a real date). The whole idea of talking online and meeting in real life is to get to know another person, but avoid asking a lot of questions that could make someone uncomfortable or suspicious of your intentions. Focus on talking about interests, hobbies, career, music taste, etc.—don’t grill them about specifics. For example, if your date tells you they run every morning, don’t ask about their daily running path—ask what they listen to while they run, or what specific goals they’re working toward.
Listen, and respect what they say. If your date says they want to limit how much they drink or get home a little earlier so they can wake up for work the next morning, respect that and support it. Don’t pressure them into staying out longer, going to a second activity, or having another drink.
Get consent. And not just if you go home with someone—pay attention to body language and facial expressions. You can make someone feel safer by being observant. If they tense up when you touch their arm, or look uncomfortable when you move closer, give them some space.
It really all comes down to showing respect. Respect the other person’s time, space, and privacy, and remember that you deserve that same courtesy from the people you meet.
Once again, you are in no way responsible for someone else’s predatory behavior, but you should feel empowered to protect yourself and avoid situations that make you feel unsafe or uncomfortable.
Keep the tips above in mind to make sure you and your date feel comfortable—then have fun getting to know new people, eating yummy food, and exploring your city. Have you tried any online dating sites as https://www.thegaychat.com? What did you do to make sure you felt safe? Share your advice in the comments below.